It’s been 5 grueling weeks since the bike crash. Today I ended my last “long” ride sobbing. I’m too spent to be witty. Here’s a recap of my rollercoaster.
The week of the crash I did nothing. I’ve never done so much nothing. The week after I managed 4 measly hours of “training” most of which was walking to work because I couldn’t bike.
On the third week I managed 10 hours of training – most of which was the Square Lake long course (1/2 Iron distance) Tri. It was my first time back on my bike. I was basically biking with one arm. At least I finished. I waited for results and had a hotdog. I biked back to my in-laws. I showered. I ate. I drove an hour home. I showered again. Four long hours after I had finished and I couldn’t imagine continuing to race for all that time and still having hours to go… I wanted to cry. So I ate a mountain of chinese delivery.
On the fourth week I tackled 22 hours of training. I had a cold rainy miserable bike ride. Then capped off the week with a 11 hour training day. It was exhausting, but I was really happy to have done it.
This last fifth week was going so well until the end. I did some awesome lifting on Monday. Did a good job running on the track with the Running Intervals class. Swam back to back days on Thursday and Friday. I had an amazing last 20 mile run on Saturday.
Today I was going to end this whole long training journey with a nice 100 miles on the bike. Nope.
Biking has been taking a little more emotional energy. Downhills make me nervous. As does questionable roads. Even just the illusion of uneven roads. Such as downed autumn leaves and dappled sunlight. Beautiful or scary? I feel like I’ve got monsters under my bed. When I’m feeling good I can convince myself that the shadows and leaves are not monsters waiting to knock me off my bike.
Today I lost it. It was a beautiful sunny morning. After some leafy trails and some old asphalt I was trying not to be miserable. Then just over 20 miles into the ride I had the last straw. I had to yell at a car cutting me off. Tears started to trickle down. Thought it would pass. When it didn’t I pulled over and called my boss/coach Nicole. “How important is this ride to my training?” I broke down sobbing. I just wanted to go home. She said it was ok to be done. My race would be fine without this ride. So I biked slowly home blinking through tears.
Not the most dignified or celebratory way to finish this training cycle. I’m so ready for taper.
You’ve done an amazing job, Kym. Even without a crazy bike crash, you’ve still gotten in such deliberate and solid training. Sunday was a lesson in other parts of training that are just as important (likely moreso) as time in the saddle. You have an amazing race ahead of you; so excited for you!!
I couldn’t have done it without you. I wouldn’t have gotten this far, and I might have gone too far on Sunday if it weren’t for you. I’m glad I can share this experience with you.
I’m a St. Paul triathlete who came across your blog not that long ago, but I’m already finding it super entertaining and I’m very impressed with the training you are throwing down for the B2B! Your last blog entry (and the one before that…) made me think of this blog post that I read a couple of years ago, also reflections on a bike crash. You are so strong to get back out there on the bike again so soon…I know that if (when?) I ever have a serious crash, I will need to rally and remind myself of strong ladies like you…and after that, write about it. 🙂 Here’s the link for the post I mentioned, if you are interested. Happy training and enjoy your race!!!!
Awwww thanks Emy! It’s lovely to hear you are enjoying my blog. Thanks for sharing the link to Katie’s blog. It’s always fun finding new stories. Crashing is one of those experiences one could do without, but if you do enough biking it seems a little inevitable. So I wish you all the best of luck keeping your rubber side down!